Allstar Wars (episode 2)

With the allstar game coming up, teams are trying to use their practice time to the maximum, while remaining silent about it, to prevent any strategy-leak. Yet Minion's Paradise was still able to get the script of the audio conversations that happened during a scrimmage match between the EU allstar team, and the NA allstar team.

The conversations of the NA-team are displayed in red.
The conversations of the EU-team are displayed in blue.
Conversations in Russian are displayed with this font.

You should probably readt part 1 here before moving on to part 2.


Ten minutes into the game, only one kill on the scoreboard, and a turret in favor of the EU-team, corresponding to a 2k gold lead. Nothing is over yet, and the first dragon fight is about to start.

SaintVicious: We should pressure mid and then go dragon. Pressure mid and go dragon, pressure mid and go dragon.

Doublelift: Dude no need to repeat that kind of stuff 30 times. I'm clearing bot and I'm coming.

scarra: I'm gonna ward that brush near dragon real quick.

scarra misses his ward and places it right before the bush.

scarra: Argh I'm so bad...

scarra misses his second ward and places it right after the bush.

scarra: I hate this game.

Xpecial: That's ok. That's a terrible mistake that might cost us the game and waste our time of practice but that's ok. I'll ward this brush.

Xpecial misses his ward placement too. Twice. There are now 4 wards around the bush, but none inside.

Xpecial: ...

SaintVicious: They're right here they're gonna do dragon. They're gonna do dragon. They're gonna do dragon. Stop farming bot and come, man of steel.

Doublelift: I may be the man of steel, but you sure as hell won't be the man of steal, since you didn't take smite dude.

SaintVicious: Fuck you Doublelift. Dyrus be ready to teleport.

Dyrus: For what?

SaintVicious: ...for dragon.

Dyrus: Oh we're doing dragon. Cool.

Diamondprox: Get ready I'm going to engage.

Edward: Be careful Alex is not there yet.

Diamondprox: I'll engage anyway, then Alex will clean up. Tell them I'll engage, Alex.


Diamondprox: Alex???

Edward: His champion doesn't move, maybe we should pause.

Diamondprox: No, I'm engaging, we win 4v5. Tell the others, you speak some English.

Edward: Our team are have now big.

sOAz: What?

Edward: Our team are have now big. Dragon.

yellowpete: I think he's trying to say Diamond will engage. But Alex seems afk I don't understand...

Diamondprox's Zac manages to land a perfect 4 men ult, followed by a very good Edward's Crescendo, but Dyrus teleports in with Rumble and NA team manages to kill the 4 members of EU team, only losing Xpecial's Janna. But suddenly, Alexich's Zed comes in, and in an amazing fashion, gets a quadra-kill in a 1v4 situation.

Diamondprox: Well you were late we could have won that fight 5-0 Alex.

yellowpete: That was really impressive, good job Alex. Too bad they got drake.

Alex: Goo goo dadaa. Gooooo

Edward: ???

Alex: Goo goo!! Waaaaaaaaaaa! Domoï! Waaaaaaaaaaa

yellowpete: Is that Alexich's baby?

sOAz: Yes it seems.

After a while, the baby stops crying.

Alexich: Hey sorry guys I had to go afk for the last five minutes. Had to let my son play. I hope he didn't screw up.

Edward: You fed him and he fed you, everything is fine.

Alexich: Sorry guys, I was afk I had a problem.

sOAz: Yor son made a quadrakill. That's fanny.

End game

The score is still pretty close, only 2k separating both teams at the 40 minutes mark. NA has an exposed inhibitor in their midlane, while EU have all their inner and outer turrets destroyed. The vision war around Baron has started.

scarra: I'm sorry I don't have any wards but that's just money wasted for me...

SaintVicious: Just protect Xpecial while he clears Baron wards, they're not grouped, their blue just spawned.

Dyrus: I have teleport I'm gonna go bot and clear the wave.

Doublelift: Don't get caught, Alexich one shots you.

SaintVicious: Don't worry he's no Hotshot.

Doublelift: You know one thing Hotshot did really well?

SaintVicious: What?

Doublelift: Taking smite on a jungler.

SaintVicious: My ignite is carrying your ass Doublelift, don't...what the fuck, what is that?

scarra: What's going on?

SaintVicious: Some guy with a camera just broke into my house and he's filming me right now. Get the fuck out of here man!

Xpecial: Oh yeah that's the crew for the next GameCrib's episode. Sorry about that.

Edward: They are clearing ward around Nashor.

yellowpete: We should group up now and pressure baron, our botlane is pushing.

Diamondprox: We should group up now and pressure baron, our botlane is pushing.

yellowpete: What did he say?

Alexich: Waaaaaaaa.

Diamondprox: What does he say?

Alexich: He asked what you said.

yellowpete:  I said we should pressure baron.

Alexich: No. I mean yes, but I was talking to Diamond in wrong language, sorry. He asked what you said.

Diamondprox: I said we should pressure baron.

Alexich: Yeah he said the same thing.
Diamondprox: I thought he asked what I said.

Alexich: No...I mean yes he asked what you said after...you know what? Fuck it, just fucking engage.

sOAz: What you say?

Alexich: FUCK!! OK?

sOAz: Well no need to be not nice...

Diamondprox: I'm engaging.

yellowpete: I'll just clear mid and then base before the fight.

Diamondprox engages the fight with a good ult, but yellowpete was nowhere near. Late to the fight, EU's ad carry can't prevent his team from getting ace'd. NA proceeds to take baron, push two inhibs and finally win the game. Well I'm sorry this is not an exciting way to relate the action but I'm not Deman.

And thus ended the first training session between NA et EU allstar teams.

[All chat] Edward: gg
[All chat] SaintVicious: gg get carried doublelift
[All chat] Doublelift: ...
[All chat] yellowpete: gg wp, nice game
[All chat] sOAz: bravo les gars
[All chat] Diamondprox: gg 1v10
[All chat] Alexich: <rogjsegojregdfjkvnskgr
[All chat] Alexich: oops, sorry was my baby ^^